Cant trust

by Tammy

I was in a very bad relationship for 4 years. He used to verbally and physically abuse me. After 2 years of being single and dating casually I now have a boyfriend I love dearly. The problem is that I can’t get myself to a point where I can relax and trust him. He is very open with me and has never given me any reason not to trust him. We’ve talked about this and he understands that I’m trying but I’m scared that this is going to push him away. Do you have advice for me?


My answer:

You are in a good relationship now and need to understand that you are breaking his trust by not trusting him. He is open with you, patient and understanding. A good man. You have to step up now and control and own what you are doing and thinking.

You don't have to give him you heart (and trust) in one go, but start with little things, If you trust him with something small and he is worthy of that trust you can next time trust him with something bigger.

If you keep building trust in this way you will find yourself in a position where one day you will realize that you can truly trust him with your everything.

Don't expect him to be perfect, nobody is, but if over time there emerges a pattern of trustworthy behavior, trust that and trust him. Cherish the good you have and heal from the bad.